Oct.10,2009 So much time, so little results

So, how did I get here, and where am I going? Hmmm.

First a little on where I am going. I am feeling a little hopeless right now. I seem to be stuck, no place to live, no good prospect for being able to afford one in the near future. But, I will keep trying.

I think I want to try hard and develop a writing career. But that will take time, and may never happen, as it doesn't for many aspiring writers. I also would enjoy working in animal/bird conservation in some way. I intend to gradually explore that as an option as well.

If I could manage to do both I'd be happy, I think. I also need to lose weight. Not only for my health, but because it really affects my self-perception and confidence. Once I was working out 5-7 days a week, and running 5 miles several times a week. I've never felt better about myself then I did then.

I really need to get my financial issues resolved. First I really need to apply for some aid. I've been dragging my feet on that- not what I intended, but I guess I am doing it, sub-consciously. I hate needing it, so I guess I am delaying applying for it, which I can't deny is really stupid, as I'm about one small financial blow away from being jobless, homeless, and suicidal.

So, my resolution to myself: Don't get frustrated. Keep working to get out of this situation. It can be overcome. And don't climb a clock tower and start shooting the populace.

How’d I get here? Next time I’ll drag myself through that mess of painful memories.




 

Oct.9, 2009 notes from last week, mostly about fish

Some notes on my recent fishing out at Benbrook Lake. Interesting to me in the future, yet boring to anyone else anytime. So versatile....


(all at HPark, sites noted)

9-30-09
Site 51. Caught ~10" Largemouth Bass, hooked and lost what was probably another- better - fish (Roadrunner lure)

10-02-09
Awesome day. Site 64. Fished most of the day, from 8 am to 8:30 pm. Used worms, and caught 7 small perch, 1 tiny catfish (channel, probably- never seen one that little, so not sure...), and 1 small sand bass. Rained on and off until noon, then clear and warm, then major storm from about 6 p.m. to 7 p.m., then saw a beautiful partial rainbow, then clear again. I had an awesome view of a nearby (maybe 10 miles away?) thunderstorm, and could see lightning in the clouds silhouette. It was VERY cool. I had a good day.

10-3-09 Site 71. I caught 2 small (8-10") bass on a chartreuse roadrunner lure. Weather misting, ~70s, overcast at first (6 p.m. or so), then it rained hard all night.

10-5-09 Site 64 Fishing again; fished most of the day. I caught 10 fish: 7 small (4-6") sand bass, 2 small perch, one nice bass ~16", 2 lbs, all on worms, on a bobber rig.

10-6-09 site 64 I caught 18 fish: 14 small (4-6") sand bass, 4 small perch (5-7") on worms on a bobber rig, all between 8:30 a.m. and noon.

Oct.6, 2009

Well I've completely redone my blog into 3 blogs now. Much more reading and effort, same dreary crap. Anyhow. I will now try and update this blog a little as I've really let it get out of date. Most my posts over the last few weeks were either reviews or nature observations, which means they got moved, and there is nothing in this, my "main" blog. Ok, maybe that IS good news, but just the same...


So, what has happened? Well, my brakes went completely out. I was on the way to have them worked on, by the husband of one of my friends from work (both of whom are really good people). Unfortunately, on the way there (about a 3-4 mile drive), the brakes went from almost not working to DEFINATELY not working. I almost ran into the guy ahead of me at the red light. I was able to coast, ram the shifter into” Park" (which slowed the SUV but didn't stop it), and repeat. I stopped about 4 inches from his bumper. Anyway, the guy who was going to help me had a tow bar, and we were able to tow the Blazer to his workshop. Of course, the tow bar almost completely ripped the bumper off, and broke all the front light bulbs, but whatareyougonndo? Anyway, long story short, thanks to his expert help (help? hell, he did it and I watched. I would have been clueless without him).

Sept.10, 2009 craptastic stuff

Well here I go again. All my previous posts and this one I wrote today. Why? Who the hell knows. I don't over-analyze myself. Especially when I do something strange. Which is often.
Last night it rained like hell. It was my first night at the lake with a (borrowed) tent. But it was raining too hard to set it up when I got there after work, so another night sleeping in the back of the Blazer. But it did cool it off some.
I fished (no luck) and watched birds this morning from 7:30 to 9ish. It was misting rain, but cool and cloudy. I will write more tomorrow, if I get a chance. Try to contain yourself. More of something else just as completely inane.

1-1-1 Read me first

I recently revised this blog, and split it into the three I have now, as it was a fucking mess. Yes, even more than it is now. I removed the parts of the old posts that related to the other two blogs (reviews and birds), and put that content into the new blogs. So, ignore the publication dates of the posts, and read them in order of the date they were actually written (which will be in the title). Or, do yourself a favor, and don't read them at all.

Sept.25, 2009 So much for a daily blog

OK I am getting behind. I think maybe I need to split this blog into three: one basic blog of my rants and daily observations/journal; one for book reviews and notes; and one for nature/birds observations. Or, I could do us all a favor, and just quit altogether.

Sept.18,2009 Friday another day here in shitville

Alright I'm tired of updating this "daily" after the fact. So now I will just date it the day I update. If something happened in on a day I didn't post I'll just kind of lump it in the new post. Yes, it will suck. But...it'll be a different kind of suck. So. Anyway. If anyone ever reads this blog, read it from the first dated post, or it will make even less sense then it does in order...